Prostate cancer saga continues

What do you do when you are waiting for results of a biopsy for prostate cancer? I pray.

There comes a point in everyone’s life they have to face the reality of their own mortality. I just had my first taste of that. You think you have many years to go — I’m 69 — and wonder, kind of theoretically how much longer you have. It started out that way for me, as it does for many. But with a cancer diagnosis the thinking begins to change. And then you find out maybe you don’t have as long as you think.

I find that spending time with God, praying and reading the Bible, gives me perspective. There is a sense of hope.

My journey continues as I go back every six months to find out if the cancer has spread of not. I’m OK now. God says so…no matter what.

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Living with prostate cancer

Have been avoiding writing lately because it means I have to think.

I was diagnosed with prostate cancer over a year ago. I was told it wasn’t going to kill me. After a year I am facing having my prostate taken out hoping to eradicate the cancer. As I write this, I’m waiting for results of my latest biopsy to find out if the cancer is any worse.

Cancer is something that happens to someone else until it happens to you. It causes you to assess who you are and what to do depending on the diagnosis. Will I live? Will I die soon? Those kind of thoughts can’t help but creep in.

I find myself talking to God a lot more, basically constantly. I have gone from hope to anger to despair and back to hope. It is a circle of emotions. I spend time with my wife talking and leaning on her hope. I hide from my feelings at times. I read the Bible every day and find comfort.

Interesting the reactions I have received from those who know about my condition. Some say they will pray, and I appreciate that. Some just “Like” my comments on Facebook. Others say nothing. All are valid reactions. Some aren’t sure what to say and some don’t want to “bother” me.

I’m calm today. Have hope for tomorrow. Results of biopsy in a few days. Then we plan for where we go from here. Quite a journey.

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Get over it and move on

I turned 69 recently. What have I learned most over the years?

Get over it and move on, as it says in the headline. I have made many mistakes in my life. I moved on. You have two choices in life. Either learn from life or be buried by it. I find it sad when I meet someone who is obviously talented, but something in their life has defined them in a negative way.

Don’t mistake my comments to say there aren’t terrible things that define some for the rest of their lives. I just watched a series of videos by Monica Crowley, a commentator on FOX News. She talked about Richard Nixon, who she worked for as a writer. He was defined by Watergate and that was a biggie. However, she speaks about the private person who she knew. He was brilliant in many ways, but that one event defined him.

For most of us, however, learning from mistakes is part of life. For the most part, I’m retired now, but I still have the same brain I used when working and I ask myself how I can contribute. I have come to believe I simply need to be available to those who want advice from someone of experience and try to help them learn some of the lessons of life.

The title of this blog says, “Morgans on Giving”. Try to find your way to give and let THAT define you.

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Which wolf do you feed?

Do you feed the good or evil wolf inside of you?

There are many ways to approach life and what you give to others. There is a constant battle inside all of us between good and evil. Which do we choose and why? My answer, for me, is to fill my mind with positive things. That can be a challenge in today’s social media world. There is a lot of junk out there.

One way I have begun to help myself dwell on positives is to not have contact with people who want to give out evil and tear down instead of spreading good and build up. That is at the heart of this blog. Focus on others’ needs and give in ways you can. It might be a simple nice word to someone or coming along side of another. You never know how much influence, good or bad, you have on others. Had an acquaintance comment to me recently wolfhow much they appreciated the positive things I post. This is a person who has lost a loved one. Those who lose loved ones too early are first comforted by those who come to the funeral and maybe keep in touch for a short time, bringing food over and such. I have found the real work begins after that. If you think of someone who has suffered loss, even if some time ago, say something nice to them, take them to coffee, to lunch or just spend time listening.

Give to others and you will be enriched in the process.

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Excessive giving

Can you network anywhere in the world? Can you give and receive referral through networking wherever you happen to be at the moment?

The resounding answer to both question is “yes you can.” There is the mindset I speak about constantly called giving first that will help you here. If you have a genuine interest in other people and that shows in your conversations, you will be amazed what happens. Excessive givingMany times I have ended up with a referral or given one by simply engaging anyone in conversation and by showing a genuine interest in them. The attached video calls this excessive giving.

Here’s the idea: do you want referrals for your business? Does it thrill you when someone refers someone else to you? Let me give you an example. Recently I had need of a physical therapist. I asked my primary care nurse practitioner where he would suggest I go for help. He gave me the names of a couple places. I chose the one that fit my travel pattern. I engaged the therapist in conversation to find out something about him. Found out we went to the same college. Made the connection and the conversation was pleasant. Less than an hour after leaving him, I was in a meeting and telling the people there how much the therapist had helped me. All three people I was meeting with had some similar issues to mine and were still in pain. I told them about the place I had just come from and how to make an appointment. They said they would.

Point of all that, is those three people will want to refer other business to me because I helped them. One of them even offered me a job that will be helping others learn the same way of doing business.

Help others anywhere you are and see what happens for you. Watch the video with Dr. Ivan Misner, founder of Business Network International (BNI) and Frederick Marcoux, National Director of BNI in Australia, for an example of how this worked for them.

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Be present

Have you ever been at a meeting with someone and suddenly realize you don’t remember a thing the other person said for the last five minutes or so? Maybe while reading the previous sentence even? OK, so I don’t want you to miss the point and hope that brought you into what I’m about to tell you.

Be present. OK, this post has made the point. Maybe I should tell you a little more. We have all had our moments of do what I call zoning out. You didn’t get enough sleep the Founder_August2014_Ivan-Misnernight before, you are worrying about something, you are anticipating where you are going next. A friend is in distress and therefore you are thinking about them. What does it all mean?

It means you are not present. Now think about that statement from the perspective of the
person you are talking to. You have decided they are not as important as something else in your life. How would you feel if they treated you that way?

To have others be involved in what you want, first you have to be interested in what is
going on with them, their thoughts, their interests. Want to be heard and cared about? Care about others first. That’s the point. Click here to read an article by Dr. Ivan Misner, found of Business Network International, on how he sees this topic.

So next time you have a conversation, are in a meeting, spend time really listening and be present. Then others will begin to be present with you.

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Not sure what to say

I copied the link to a story about a woman in need of an operation on July 20, 2014. I wasn’t sure what I would say about her, so I waited two weeks to figure out what to say. Do you sometimes not know what to say or do about a circumstance you encounter?

My dilemma was and is that there are so many needs today, how do you decide which ones to embrace? Should guilt prompt you to decide? Does it have to be something that pulls at your heartstrings? Does someone else have to ask you to help? My answer for me is that I respond when I feel prompted to do so. Not out of guilt, Shirleybut out of putting myself in the other person’s shoes, so to speak.

In this case it was rather easy since Stephanie Headley is facing a life-threatening autoimmune disease. Her life is threatened. How about a different circumstance where life is not threatened? It can be triggered because you have a connection with someone, if they are related to you or someone you care about, for example. I cannot make a decision for you. You cannot make a decision for me. My only suggestion is simply to help someone, sometime. You will be a better person for having done so. Oh, and you will feel so much better about yourself.

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